Why “Let Them Cry It Out” Doesn’t Work

One of the most common pieces of advice given to guardians of struggling dogs is to simply leave them and wait for them to get used to it. Unfortunately, this approach is not only ineffective for anxiety, it can be deeply harmful.

When a dog is experiencing panic, their brain is not in a learning state. Stress hormones flood the body, the heart rate increases, and survival instincts take over. In this state, the dog is not learning that being alone is safe. They are learning that they are overwhelmed and unsupported.

Some dogs eventually stop vocalising when left alone. This is often mistaken for progress. In reality, many of these dogs have shut down. Silence does not always mean calm. It can also mean exhaustion, fear, or learned helplessness.

True learning happens when a dog feels safe enough to process what is happening. That means returning before distress escalates, not waiting for it to burn out. It means teaching the dog that you always come back, and that time alone is predictable and manageable.

Comforting a distressed dog does not reinforce fear. Fear cannot be rewarded. Comfort builds trust, and trust is what allows confidence to grow over time.

Independence is not taught through abandonment. It is built through safety.

All the best,

Victoria